Friday, February 1, 2008

L.A. - Expensive, Beautiful, Bitchy






For those of you from the East coast, it bears mentioning that Los Angeles is absolutely nothing like Manhattan. It’s beautiful, clean, and full of people who look like they’re trying to look like they’re not trying too hard but really are - if that makes sense. Due to time constraints I’ll admit that we really only saw Beverly Hills and Hollywood rather than South Central but still…I’m pretty sure most of the folks we passed were models or actors or European royalty that had been Botoxed within an inch of their lives. *Sigh* You know, people living the good life.

This overpopulation of gorgeous rich people perhaps explains why when we visited the Versace store on Rodeo Drive we had a very Julia Roberts/Pretty Woman experience complete with frosty saleslady following us around and yelling at us for taking pictures in the store. Ooops. The only difference between Pretty Woman and our lives is that we left with our tales between our legs instead of coming back with Richard Gere and throwing wads of cash at the bitches. But whatever. Nevertheless, this small snafu did not prevent us from peeking into the windows of more luxury shops or from using the (free!) ginormous marble bathrooms in the Regent Beverly Wilshire. BTW, the handicapped stall in the women’s bathroom is definitely bigger than my bedroom was in Manhattan. (Editor’s Note: If you happen to be on Rodeo Drive and need to use the facilities (or are just really bored) definitely check these out – they even have Molton Brown hand soap…lovely! Personally, I like to know where all the good bathrooms in town are because you never know when that nonfat soy latte might take take a turn for the worse. On a side note, if you’re in NYC, the bathroom at the Pottery Barn in SoHo on the lower level is equally as clean, although far from luxurious.)

Besides window shopping in Beverly Hills, we absolutely had to do the tourist thing and so for $5.00 we bought a map of the stars’ homes and drove around the city with our friend Danny. We insisted on taking pictures outside all of the big celebrities’ houses, but unfortunately in most of the pictures all you can see is a gate. Elitist bastards. I guess people like Madonna (see picture of Danny w/map) got tired of people like us taking pictures outside their homes…I can’t imagine why…

For lunch we headed over to West Hollywood and cruised into one of my new favorite dives. It’s called the Saddle Ranch Chop House and presides over Sunset Boulevard with a woodsy, saloon-like exterior complete with balconies full of busted mannequins dressed up as Old West prostitutes and cowboys. Need I say more? The food is cheap and tasty and the portions are big enough to satisfy Jared pre-Subway diet. Plus, for under $50 you can order a 3.5 liter “Tower of Beer” or giant martini glasses full of cotton candy. All this and they’ve got a mechanical bull. Sadly for us the bull was broken while we were there, but we were given 2 free shots each on the house (woohoo!) in something the size of a juice glass, and frankly I can’t say enough good things about the service. My husband is still talking about the candied yams served with marshmallows in a cast iron skillet.
Following lunch we walked next door to Carney’s Hamburgers and Hotdogs - a tiny little restaurant set up inside an old train car. Their motto “Probably the World’s Best Hamburgers and Hotdogs” was not put to the test as we didn’t eat, but their food looked greasily delicious and there was a line (always a good sign) of locals waiting to be served. We took one of the picnic tables outside the train car, ordered a few beers and watched the parade of people traipse down Sunset as the afternoon wore on. All in all a beautiful day in a beautiful town.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Guys, this blog truly enriches my life. I just can't wait until the next post. The pic of you guys in front of the car is amazing, loving the pose, Linds. I would really like a poster sized version for my wall. Keep on rockin'... xoxo

Anonymous said...

Wait a second, you went to the Saddle Ranch and didn't ride the mechanical bull?

Anonymous said...

Wait a second, you went to the Saddle Ranch and didn't ride the mechanical bull?